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I Still Miss You

I woke up this morning missing you like you'll never know. I dream about you. Sometimes when I'm alone I can hear your laughter fill the room. It was such a distinct laugh. It meant that everything was right in the world. On Sunday I would watch you singing your heart out in the choir, shouting about how good our God is. We didn't tell the preacher that on Friday night you were singing down-home blues at the top of your lungs, sipping your Hennessy. You loved the blues. You loved playing tonk till midnight in the projects. That was fun you'd say... for you. I wanted to go to bed :-)

I can almost hear you singing right now. Z.Z. Hill was your favorite blues singer. I can feel you from when you would hug me so tight and tell me, "everything is gonn be alright" and how much you loved me. I remember when you were mad at me. That never lasted long. Every year on my birthday you would call me and sing the Happy Birthday song to me. I would call you and ask if you needed anything, anything at all, and you would say, "I need you to be happy".

I don't know if I could have truly expressed how proud I was of you, but I was so proud of you. I remember you saying, "you know I did the best I could with you..." And yes, I know that. I know that you loved me like no other on this earth. Your best was more than good enough. IT WAS!

And I loved you. I still love you so much. I know I was your hope and I know I am your dream. I know that you couldn't go on anymore. I know your body was letting you down although you wanted to stay for us. I'm glad you have no more pain but I have pain now missing you every day. It's been almost four years now, so it's getting easier. Knowing you're with our God helps me get through.

I love and miss you every day. I'm OK now. Standing on my own. Holding you in my heart.

I love you mamma and I always will.

W. Maxine Perry
1945-2009

If you're reading this, tell them you love them before it's too late.

Comments (page 8)

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  • Amara Williams Atlanta GA

    That really spoke to me Tyler because I lost two people in the same year. A girl named NaTina Reed my god sister, and also Charles Parker my god brother and they were both 21 and the last time I spoke to them they both gave me courage. And also that was rely beautiful I almost cried during it

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  • Prophetess Miranda Jackson Chicago, IL

    Tyler, This message is a very beautiful portrait of your love for your mother. I know that you miss her terribly; however, know that she is your guardian and angel...she is always with you, watching over you, and helping to keep you safe along your journey. What you miss most of all is talking to her about everything, but understand that she is never far from you. Personally, this is a season to admit somethings, to come to accept somethings, and to acknowledge what is still needed and missing in your life. Look beyond what you have accomplished and share with our Lord your longing for what has been promised, but yet hasn't manifested. Pray and seek the presence of God for what is needed, ask for direction, and HE will surely guide you to the love you have desired. I'm praying as hard as you are.

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  • Beverley Thomas houston, texas

    TP keep her in your heart that will keep you going my mother been gone home for 34 years and sometime I have to go to the graveside and tell her what going on in my life to feel better so hold her in your heart

    Reply
  • DEBRA JOHNSON MICHIGAN

    Your letter was so touching my mother is 88, sick, weak..and I know GOD is preparing me for her home coming..I told my son I loved him too...and while I'm living I want you to know I love you too.(smile). On june 17, (my birthday) I was rushing to take care of business due to tornado warning in my county..when I reached my destination I paid no attention that nobody was in the parking lot it was around 4:00pm..anywho when I got out the car and look up I was directly below the storm cloud..GOD GLORY was so awesome I just follow the cloud because I was able to see the turbulence the sun behind the dark cloud it was UNSPEAKABLE and GOD spoke to me..and walk up to me and ask me why I wasn't scared and I responded because this is the power of GOD. He told me everyone took shelter. I was the tornado form as it went further east and it was powerful, awesome, and mighty..everytime I close my eyes to go to sleep I see the glory I saw behind the cloud and have reassurance that GOD is truly with me in what I dealing with.. I'm so empowered and know now the battle is truly not mind.. So you stay strong and stand in the power of his might while he uses you to do his work while here on earth.. BE BLESSED YOUR SISTER IN CHRIST

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  • DawnMarie Parlin NJ

    Tyler I do know what it's. Like to feel a lot of pain? I lost my mom & dad my mom 27 yrs ago & my dad 13 yrs ago... It's. Been very hard for me to let either one go-- they both passed from Cancer.. I feel them all the time and sometimes I feel I want to be with them??? I told my parents I loved them mo night everyday??? I have such a VOID in my life its too much sometimes to bare. I'm happy they are with GOD he loved them very much and I'm happy they are no longer in pain.. I love and miss them soooo very much... my love will never die for them until I'm with them.. I LOVE U MOM & DAD

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  • Mo Houston, Texas

    Hi Tyler, Last night I sat down and read this e-mail you sent, I have to admit I was in tears. This week is very sentimental to me because Aug. 3rd would have been my mother's birthday. In 2008 my mom past away with Stage 4 Cancer. Although God continues to provide me with my strength, it seems like it was yesterday. As I continue to get through this week I will remember the good times and bad times that me and my mom shared. I miss her dearly but I do know that God had a better plan for her. Thank you so much for the inspiration and continue being a blessing for others.

    Reply
  • Gerri Iquo Abuja,Nigeria

    Mr Perry i feel your pain and understand how you feel. Immediately i got your message i sent a text to my Mom just to tell her i love her and within the next 1hour my Mom came to give me a Lunch time visit at work just to tell me she loves me. I and my Mom had lunch together near my office. It was a wonderful day. Thanks Mr Mr. Perry i owe that wonderful day to you. As I have been telling myself what would i have done without my Mom? My Father refused to give me an Education because i am a girl child. It was my Mother who sacrificed and t singlehandedly gave me an education and sent me to school. Now am a Lawyer. Yes i owe all my thanks to God and my Mom for my being a Lawyer today. Mr Tyler Perry if you ever need motherly love and advise i can share my Mother with you if you wont mind having a Nigerian Mother. My Mother can never replace or take your Mother's Place in your life. But My Mom can always call you up to sing and wish you happy Birthday on your Birthday if anything just to make you happy and lift your spirit. My Mom can pray with you and for you the way only a mother can do to put your mind at peace. My Mom can cook you home made dishes only the way Momma knows how to cook if you are willing to eat Nigerian dishes. My Mom can call you up to tell you i love you and how are things going on with you only the way Mommy does. Thanks for helping me appreciate my Mom and showing me how lucky i am to have her alive. All I am praying is God to help me and my siblings raise the needed money very soon for my Mom to under a Surgery for her Gout that makes her bend over while walking in Dubai,India or US. My Mom having gout,needing a surgery for her Gout gives me so much worry but i know God is faithful and will help i and my siblings so she can have the surgery soon. I also pray God to keep my Mother alive to see me get married and have my own Children. By God's Grace there is nothing that will make me more happy and fulfilled in life than to have my Mother see, hold and carry my own kids. My Mother is a very good Mother. God bless Tyler Perry and the memory of your sweet Mother.

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  • denise BRENTWOOD,CA.

    OPPS!!! I did not know that this is the place to reply to your message. I should have known!! Mymother is 87 and just had a stroke and my dAD IS 90 going strong!!! (for now) I am so grateful to still have them both and reading your message today is a God shout ..... i am letting them both know (well dad is a little hard arond the edges) that they are both so loved and appreciated , and sometimes its dificult but i read messages like yours and feel so blessed that i know how to tell them i love them NOW. That is all i have to say.. thank you

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  • Jan Memphis, Tn

    T.P. I truly understand where you are coming from. I lost my one and only brother to liver cancer in January. I miss him so much!. Although my brother was confined to a wheel chair he was a go getter he didn't let his handicap keep him from moving forward. He developed progressive liver cancer from the medication that he had to be on for over 30 yrs. He was only 57 years old. I know he is in a better place because he is now with our father in heaven. He was always strong for us his (family) then we had to be strong for him during his illness. He will be forever missed but truly never forgotten. I don't know if you will get this comment or not, but I just wanted you to know that you are not alone. Sincerely, Missing Him Jan M.

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  • IRINE ASANJI aka LIA= Lord Is Able Canada

    I wonder what my life would have been without my mother. The efforts she made to place food on the table. Even without meat many times it was better than eating nothing else after many hours at elementary school learning, many hours on foot climbing hills and descending valleys to return home from secondary school and many other similar days that went by only by the Grace of God. I can sincerely say only the Grace of God saw me and my siblings through those years but had my mother not relied on the grace of God putting in her mite to sustain us then our story would have been told by someone else and not us, definitely not me who cheated death many times in my lifetime still thanks to my beloved mother. God bless her and keep her alive long enough for me to give her all she deserves. Tough as life may still be for me and my own two babies today, I look back to the strength my mother mustered to raise 8 of us and I tell myself, I must make it if she made it. Tyler, for a man to love a mother as much as you do, makes me work harder to be able to earn the love of my three year old son and 2 year old daughter I am singly raising right now. I know that someday, they will be proud to leave a comment on your page or somewhere in the world to say, Mummy LIA didn't give up because of us. Love you Mother and I am taking your love across to another generation. Your Daughter, LIA=Lord is Able

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  • JEANETTE palm beach fl

    Hi Tyler, I lost my mom nov12,2009 and I tell my mom every day how much I miss her and love her, as days go by I thought it would get easier. but I find myself for no reason ,tears running down my face. but I know shes in a better place no more pain, cancer is a real bad thing.i love when you talk about your momma, cause I feel as if you know my pain. god bless my friend, and every day say I love you to who ever it may be. because tomorrow isn't a given day. let me be the one to say I LOVE YOU!!! AND A GREAT BIG HUG!!!

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  • Denise Holiday Linden, NJ

    Hello Tyler, You are always inspiring. I lost my mom in October, shortly before super storm Sandy. My Mom unfortunately had Alzheimers, so she was gone long before in some ways, but she still had that smile, and we always said I love you! I have been missing her for so long and I didn't get to see her often. I agree Tyler...say I love you as much as you can. I always expected her to be there...she lived to be 95...Thankful to have had her for all those years...I'm sorry you lost your mom, I know you miss her...keeping you in prayer always.

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