Tyler Perry.com


Warning! Be Careful How You Treat Your Children!

In my prayer and quiet time at 5am, I was praying about how to (one day) be the best father that I can be. I have no doubt that I will be a great dad, but as I looked back in my life for an example, all I could remember were all of the horrible things that were said and done to me as a kid. But before I could get sad about it, I remembered something I wrote a while back about "learning in reverse".

If you are like me and had no good examples, then your lesson is in reverse. I learned many years ago that if I do the opposite of what was done and said to me then I have learned how to be a good father some day. Which lead my mind to a line in one of my favorite songs of all time. It's called “Mary Did You Know”. I've written about this before, but I think it's worth sharing again.

The song is about Mary, the mother of Jesus, and in the song the lyrics ask the question, “Mary, did you know that the child that you delivered will soon deliver you?” Such a powerful question. I want to ask parents this question today. Do you know how special your child is? Do you know who God has put into your house? I know sometimes you think it's just your child but I'm sure many parents of children who went on to change this world had no idea who was sleeping down the hall from them. Be careful, because the child that you delivered may one day have to deliver you. Meaning, the very child that you gave birth to and you took care of in your youth may be the child that has to take care of you as you age. If my mother was alive she would testify, I'm sure.

My prayer for us today:

I pray this morning, oh God, for every parent of children born and yet to be born to have a clearer understanding of the blessing that their child is. I also pray for the safe return of the Nigerian girls. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

Have a beautiful day.

Comments (page 2)

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  • Kendra Gully Zion, IL

    I needed that, Thanks....

  • jenny lawrenceville ga

    Dear Mr Perry first let me bless you continuously for all you have done for yourself and others. i am a 45 yr old disabled separated mother of 3. i recently came back to ga a little over a month after being homeless with my kids 23 13 and 3. a very stressful time in my life separating with my husband as well although sometimes i just felt like giving up your movies always cheer me up and motivate me to keep going along with my God who knows i am a strong woman and just want my kids to be in a stable home. sometimes i think i failed my kids because of all the trials we have been through but their laughter their i love u mom makes me realize that now where we are we have nothing no furniture not enough beds clothes or dont know how long we will be in this home due to it going through a short sale i dont have any monies to relocate i support my kids off my social security disability my oldest wants to go to school and work to help his daughter back in pa but its hard when we have no vehicle to mobilize but yet they are happy and that makes me somewhat happy to know we can laugh at each other sit down and eat together and talk about anythings. Basically Mr Perry my kids have been through alot and im not too healthy and just want to know that if i pass they will be ok and have a stable home to live for as long as they live. i am asking if you can possibly help me to just acquire this home as is i can work on it little by little to make it what i want it to be if i know its mine and my childrens home. i only know that so far appraisers have given a number of 70,000 being that it needs work in would work for you and my son would too if given the opportunity i am not asking for charity because i believe and was taught to work for whatever i get and so with that i would work we would work hard to repay you if we had too. my address is 2483 chablis ct lawrenceville ga 30043 if anything i would love for you to visit and give more words of encouragement to my kids if nothing else they love your movies especially my 13 yr old she loves all the madea movies and loves the good deeds movie i always cry at that movie because i know whats its like living from place to place trying to maintain your children i am blessed to just have all my kids with me and with my income of social security support all our needs not all our wants a little i do they smile they smile they smile and its a others happiness to just see that. you are an inspiration to me and many and i just wanted to thank you and to always know we are watching your work. hope to hear and see you one day soon thank you blessed jenny melenciano

  • Tasha FL

    Dear Tyler, The song "Mary Did You Know" is MY favorite song as well!!! I finally got a version of Ceelo Green's on my Ipod. I wish they would play it ALL day on a radio station around the holidays. Love to you and yours, Tasha

  • Maria M United States

    I understand not having an example to follow. I'm the oldest of three and my mother favored/s my younger siblings. We have different fathers and I believe it played a part somehow. I wasn't allowed to see my dad but they were. I could go on about the physical mental abuse that I endured but I won't. I remember feeling so alone unwanted. I was filled with so much anger content that I was on a path of self destruction then God allowed me to be a mother. Doctors said my body was going through an abnormal abortion. My body was treating my child like an infection and was trying to kill him.. God said otherwise. I can remember saying I will not allow my past to be the floor plan of my future. I chose to make it like a story in the bible, learn and grow from it. I can remember looking at my first child and feeling delivered from the hurt that was still a major part of my life. I felt delivered from the ignorance of allowing that past hurt to subconsciously dictate my life. I have two children, different fathers and I have a cousin that applauds me as a mother because of what I went through. They are God fearing terrific children. I praise God and applaud my kids because without I believe I would still be wallowing in the past.

  • LaDella Robles Charlotte, NC

    Mr. Perry this post and prayer you shared absolutely MOVED ME. I'm sitting here at work in tears. My boys(3) are MOST DEFINITELY special. And I KNOW that one day they will "deliver" me and take care of me. I always tell them that they can be WHATEVER they want to be. They are smart funny and VERY INTELLIGENT. I try to teach them not to "follow the crowd" or get jealous of what others have or do because as long and they pray GOD will bless them as he has blessed me with them, and when their time come it will be GREATER AND MORE POWERFUL than the people that got there before them. My mother always told me to reach for the moon because if you just happen to miss it you can still grab hold of a star. This is what i teach my boys. I dont care how "out there" or beyond my knowledge or capabilities their dreams are. I will do my BEST to find out and help them get there. God placed me on this earth to help others and i wont let him down. My kids will get there. Im not their gifts, for they are mines and my blessings and i will cherish and nurture them to the fullest. I say all this just to say thank you. Thank you for those words. I know it was written some months ago, but God put it in front of my eyes today for a reason. My oldest son wrote you a letter 2 days ago and ask me to send it to you. I have no idea how to, but believe me i will find a way some how. Thanks again for the encouragement and encouraging words. I will not let my son down. I really hope you get this message and that if it doesn't do anything else, i hope it puts a smile on your face and let you know that heaven is watching over you and that your blessings are a blessing to others. A warm spirit to spirit hello and thanks to you. You just made my day, months, and years to come. LaDella Robles

  • Ricky l Miller Raleigh, NC

    I am a single father raising my 2 yr old daughter. I work a "9 to 5" with no assistance from any local, State, or Federal programs. No food stamps, Childcare Assistance or Housing Vouchers. I am raising my daughter the best I can with plenty of Love and Attention. I cannot Provide everything that I would like for her.Also I am trying to help break the stereotype of African-American Men not being in our children's lives. I want to Start a Single Fathers Society any Money Donated will go directly towards my daughter's well being and early education. Also help me build this platform for single fathers. Im sure we've all heard the saying "It takes a Village to raise a Child" Children are Our Future. Any donation or consideration is greatly appreciated more than I can possibly express.

    • claryssa ford pittsburg ca #2053961

      amen.I love being a mother,my greatest joy is watching her grow, and seeing her grow in her relationship with Christ. there is no doubt God's has his hand on her and she will go on to do wonderful things for the kingdom. my prayer all also is for the return of those beautiful girls.

  • Carol Donaldson Dayton, Ohio

    Hello!Mr. Perry hope you read the poem I wrote especially for you on being a father.

  • Brooke United States

    Very Powerful words. I'm obviously reading this a little late Mr. Perry, but inspiration can never come too late. Growing up my parents weren't bad or cruel to us, instead they were awful to each other. Which can sometimes damage a kid more. My father would punch my mother in the face and my sisters and I would all jump in front of her to stop my dad, because he wouldn't lay a hand on us. At the age of 6 I knew they shouldn't be together, and I would constantly pray they would divorce. My father was not a one woman man and my mother only wanted a husband so she could get insurance. Sometimes it's sad to know people prefer security over happiness and love. I would wake up every morning hoping CPS would take us away, but even after all the visits they never came back to whisk me into the world I made up in my head. Sadly social services seems to have a tendency to show up when its too late or not at all. Instead it was the same every night my mother would make my father a beautiful steak dinner paid for with the money that was supposed to feed us. After eating he would get dressed to go on his usual "trip" to see a girlfriend or something with his brand new car and jordans. My sisters and I would sit there and wait for the fighting to begin and then I would run into the kitchen to steal the leftovers so I could eat. Finally by the time my father would leave my mother would have us search the house for money so we could go to the store and buy a chicken so we could eat. Instead it would go toward a pack of cigs for her. On a regular basis coming home sucked and going to school was worse constantly picked on because my clothes were gross and we had no money. Sadly the teachers at the school I went to preferred to look the other way instead of seeing their was a kid who needed help. Finally the most amazing thing happened. My parents sat us down and said we're getting divorced! I was beyond happy I even jumped up and said THANK GOD! Of course I got sent to therapy for that comment. lol what child gets excited about divorce. I thought this is it a fresh start at the age of 10. No more watching my mom get punched in the face. No more scavenging for food or money for my moms cigarettes. No more watching my mom care more about my father than us, and finally no more getting picked on in school for being well a mess. Boy was I wrong things just got worse we moved into my nanas house and I didn't really understand alcoholism drug abuse and predators til we lived with my nana and her husband. I shared a room with my mom and sisters in a small town house I got the floor because I was the youngest and my sisters would share the bed..........there is a moral to this story and currently the morals are up so I will say to be continued until after I help fuel the minds of our future :)

    • lynn #2017939

      Can't wait to hear the rest!

  • Pamela Blackwell

    Will you please (help me ) 5 kids involved, Father is Michael fowler is father he works on your set in Atlanta. They are in state custody.it is take all or none. Please get in touch with me. Will explain more. My husband and I only have,2br double wide.he has remarried.. With new baby. Both him and new wife, have been have been charged with child cruelty in 1&2nd degree. Please help me . Ages 5-14 please help me. Will you please give me feedback please don't let me wonder. If you really read these messages.I have taken care of them all there lives.please thank you Pamela Blackwell. Again

    • Ty! Peace #2013177

      You should really look into this situation!

  • sonia United States

    thanks for this posting. this brought tears to my eyes. at times i get fusterated with my little boy, he is such a handful, motherhood is hard. but now when i go home , i will see my son in new light. for i have just realized the love god has for me. thank you. god bless always

  • Delphia Tyus Cincinnati, Ohio

    Thank you so much for those inspiring words about "Mary's Baby. Being an ignorant mother back in the day when my children were adolescents, I said some harsh words to them. I came from abusive relationships and in my stupidity I took things out on my children. No excuses, they were rebellious because of my ignorance. Not throwing a pity party either. My son is 40 and my daughter is 36. And I am so proud of their accomplishments. And I make sure I let them know it. I have apologized for my ignorance and yelling, and I except my faults. As children they never knew why I showed anger and it hurt them. At this time in my life I realized it was because me being abused mentally and sexually. They bring up hurtful words and it hurts to hear it, but I thank God for the strength to bare their venting. It's a slow process but we are healing through God's Mercy and Grace. My son and I have a great relationship even when he vents. My daughter is another story, but God is working with her too. I know she loves me, she just don't like me. And its okay, but i will not allow her to disrespect me. especially when I have bent over backwards to amend fences with her by helping her raise her 4 children from her abusing them physically when 241-kids puts them in my protective custody. I guess my love for her and her children pulls at my heart strings. She tells me i go overboard being a grandmother, Duh! Didn't mean to go on, but its such a delicate subject. That's another Oprah Show. Be blessed! And Yey! Thanks for bringing that out of me. You Brilliant Man! Maya was totally right! Much love to you Sir!

  • Nicole NC

    Mr. Perry that was something I needed to hear. Since I separated from my spouse I worked so hard to give her what she needed and since the divorce I feel like I can't do enough. Sometimes the guilt of taking away her family is overwhelming. But thanks be to God she dances through all our struggles. She is a thriving eight year old, who inspires me to love hard and tells me we will get through this. I will embrace this gift that I have been given, thank you for the reminder.